Page 104 - Choosing a Child Care Center

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initiate. After your child has disengaged from the
struggle or you have successfully redirected them, do
all you can to find ways to reconnect. Play with them,
bake cookies, or just hug them and let them know
how much they are loved. This routine practiced in
the early years sets the stage for less dramatic and
more peaceful resolutions as they reach the teen
years.
It Could Play Out Differently… Better…
Next Time
Let’s go back to the fairy wings incident; you may
have been able to prevent a struggle simply by choos-
ing not to engage in the first place. Your daughter’s
wings may have been met with snickers from her
classmates, her teacher may have asked her to re-
move them, or the photographer may have convinced
her that the wings didn’t match the background.
Natural consequences would have come into play
without any input from you, and ultimately, your
daughter would have gained some insightful experi-
ence. (And bonus, you’re not the bad guy!)
Most power struggles can be averted if we consist-
ently apply these 3 steps before, during, and after a
struggle. Remember, it’s a relational cycle. Your
children will notice you are willing to share a little
more of the power than you did before. In turn, your
children will learn to wield power more responsibly

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